What you missed, Part 2: Alias.

As much as I like writing... sometimes pictures just work better.

So what else did you miss the last 18 months? I already mentioned my thesis defense. Two days later, I got a new name. 

Credits (local vendors in bold and italics)
Photos - Valerie Usui Photography (or, local at time of booking/wedding planning)
Dress/Alterations - Columbia Bridal Boutique / Silver Threads Alterations
Tuxes - Men's Warehouse
Rings - Helzberg and Silver Sparrow Designs
Flowers - Wedideas
Flask - Marotte Leather
Cake - Debi's Cake Studio
Cake Topper - Mudcards
Venue/Food - Baldwin's Station
First Look Photo Venue - A Likely Story Bookstore

What you missed, Part 1: Titled.

There are some statements that could be considered exaggerations.

That was the best cheesecake EVER.

Maybe the whole thing with the fire ants was a bad idea.

I have been in school FOREVER.

In my case, I think that last one was technically true. 

I went from undergraduate right into a Ph.D. program, something I think I would never have done had I known better. At times it was fun, and now that it is over I am finding it easier to remember that. Frequently it was horrible. 

I stuck it out for a few reasons. First of all, I am stubborn. Second, the idea of quitting was scary. But I like to think the most important reason I stayed is because, every so often, it was AWESOME. I loved the moments - few and far between as they were - when I got something to work (repeatedly) and realized I was looking at something new. Something where I could go to the world "I know something you don't know" and actually be kind of almost sure it was true.

Mostly, it was probably the second thing though. I used to think that it is hard to be something that you're not.

In any case this happened last spring. May 17th, to be precise.

"So listen carefully.... SCIENCE!"

"This is what I can do with powerpoint."

"Look, some more things I can do with powerpoint."

It took me about eight weeks to recover normal sleeping habits after the defense... which was actually fine, because I did a lot of great TV show watching and reading in the unmentionable hours of the day.

The defense, like my research career, wasn't all that pretty. It wasn't really enjoyable. Fortunately I had the support of a loving and wonderful family, especially on the sprint through the end. 

And, two days after my thesis defense, I got to go to a really fantastic party.

More on that soon...

Lost voice.

About a year and a half ago, I lost my voice.

I don't mean my actual voice, more my writing voice. I went from needing a change to, for about a solid year, doing very little writing. At least, very little writing of the sort anyone would actually want to read.

And, to be honest, I did very little swimming and running, either.

A lot has happened since then.

I'll get to that in some posts later.

I've missed my voice. I know I missed it because a number of times I tried to go back and find it. I had several false starts at new blogs, because I felt like I wasn't quite the right person to keep writing this one. Food blog. Craft blog. Wedding blog. Collaborative blog. 

Each time I'd get a few posts (or less) in and lose interest. That's a lot of blogging projects to flop.

I've missed my readers (Hi Mom!) and the blogging community. 

The last few weeks have been different. I keep thinking about things I want to write about. I snap photos that need to be shared before I throw my phone out the window. I'm back to reading blogs, even if I'm quiet about it.

As for the swimming and the running? Well... one step at a time. Wouldn't want to pull a muscle. :)

"Whaaa...? We're back!"

Thank you!

It's my birthday today!


As I mentioned during the Bucket List Blogfest (which was Awesome, you guys rock!), I tend to get reflective this time of year. This year, it was looking forward. 


Last year, I was kind of in a low place. So I turned the lead-in to my birthday into a blog project that demanded some pretty intense self-examination. Looking back at where I was then, and where I am now, I think I'm at least on the right track. 


This is a nice feeling. And it reminds me of how much I have to celebrate.

WikiMedia, used under terms of creative commons.

So the only thing left is to say thank you.


Thanks to all my family and friends for being so wonderful and supportive.


Thank you for the smiles or hugs or notes or signs of encouragement that seem like small things, but really are big things.


Thank you to all of you who read what I write and leave your own thoughts.


Thank you for writing blogs, articles, stories and/or novels that move me.


Thank you for running with me (or listening to me blab on about running).


Thanks for being a great person.


Rock on. :)

The Bucket List Blog Fest!

Hooray! It's TIME!


For what, you ask?


The Bucket List BlogFest, of course!


For this Blog Fest, Blog-Fest-ers (Festoons?) were meant to come up with an 'ultimate list' of things they want to do. That list could be big-picture like life goals, or focused on something related to their blog/topic of interest. 


And since I somehow edited left out the recommendation for five items in both promo posts (whoops!), people have complete freedom over their list. :) The only rule was to post their blog to the Mr. Linky Widget below.


You can find a list of participants below!




Now, on to my 5.  These are not listed in order of priority...


1. Spend a month in one of the following places: Provence, France; Sardinia, Italy; and Istanbul, Turkey.
These are all places where, when I see pictures or hear about them, I realize I want to do nothing more but go there, eat, drink, and wander. I like travel shows, but something struck me as special in each place. I would like to take a few weeks, rent an apartment or something, and find out what that is.


2. Write novels that other people want to read.
Writing is solitary, and it's difficult. Really, I know I can only write for myself... it's impossible to do otherwise. Still, I want people to read my work. Oh, yeah. An Oprah Book Club Sticker would be nice, too. Maybe that can be #6.

3. Grow a family.

I kinda debated putting this one in here, and I wasn't sure how to word it - in part because it's so personal, but also because I have a great family, one that includes mine and Matt's. Still, I'll eventually be ready to ignore the ominous warnings of my sometimes frustrated mother during my childhood: "someday, you'll have kids just like you, and then you'll understand!" 

4. Retire to a beach house in the Outer Banks.
Maybe not a wise plan with global warming and "rising sea levels", but I love the OBX. I'd love to buy a small beach house down there and, when it's finally time to stop working, disappear there for a while.


5. Run a 100-miler.
Actually, the ultimate goal stemmed from a desire to run Badwater. I've read about it and, as horrible as it sounds... my interest was piqued. But since the chances of me getting in are slim, a 100-miler seems like a seriously formidable challenge to tackle in the coming years.




Thanks for reading my list, I look forward to reading the great entries below! 

Bring it On Thursday

I can't help it; today just seems primed for Awesome.


I'm so sure of it, I used a semicolon in my opening line. I KNOW.


Want to see how awesome works too? Check out this effort by YA author Maureen Johnson* - she woke up yesterday and decided to make the world suck just a little less. And then she did something. She raised, over the course of the day, $6000 in donations for a charity called Shelterbox. And the fundraising will continue today.


In a world where too many well-known people tweet/blog/say... just... the stupidest things... this was pretty cool.


I have a plan to make the world (or at least, my little piece of it) a little more awesome too - small things. It will involve smiling and greeting everyone I meet, getting in touch with people I've neglected, and doing at least one nice thing for someone else.**






What are you going to do today? Tell me in the comments below!







Don't forget to sign up for the Bucket List Blogfest, and tune in tomorrow for a very sweet Food Versus Food. 


Edit: Link to case-in-point example of celebrity stupidity via Twitter.




*  YA author? Yes, I am an adult. And I read her books. They're very good.
** I felt like I needed a list, but the plan is flexible. Who knows what the day will bring?

Write that down.

A few weeks ago, while driving down 95, I caught part of an interview on NPR, the "Fresh Air" program. I was in a hurry - I can't remember why, I was probably late. 


What I do remember is this: the interview was background, I was only half-listening, until the guest got to this point. And then, suddenly, I was listening. Intently. 


Transcript quote:

"...what happened was, I wrote so much in this book, I would sit at my table for hours and hours 'til my mother made me go to bed. And it was like this - this obsession with words and with writing. And as I got further away from that notebook - now as I was on the street and these ideas would come, I would run into the corner store, the Bodega, and grab like, a paper bag or just buy a juice, anything just to get a paper bag. And then I'd write the words on the paper bag and stuff these ideas in my pocket 'til I got back."  

(Italics and hyperlink mine) 


Who was the guest?  Jay-Z.


So, rap/hip-hop is not a genre of music I know well. It's not that I don't like it. I just don't often choose it. In some cases, I don't feel connected to the songs.


Still, this guy with a dramatically different life experience that's conveyed in a medium I don't know was talking about something I did know (well, sorta).


Ideas happen, often when I'm far from my workspace. I've stopped in my tracks and scrambled for my phone to snap a picture of something that prompted an idea for story. I've dug around for a pen to scrawl an idea in my notebook or on the back of a receipt if the notebook wasn't handy. 


So I thought it was cool to hear him talk about that passion for words. I'm not saying I understand Jay-Z's life experience, but I connected to an aspect of a story he told about it. 


That brief connection definitely made me want to listen as long as I could to the rest of the interview, found here. 


Incidentally, Jay-Z did a rap I that really liked when it came out - because I found it interesting and different. It was cool to hear him talk about that in the interview, too.

Disclaimers: 

Video is courtesy of YouTube.

May contain NSFW/Adult language, content.

Have you ever had a moment of surprise connection?  Tell me in the comments below.

Hard Decisions

Alarm clock goes off. 


4:50am.


"Are you getting up, or are you snuggling with the muttsos?"


A moment of silence.


"Will you be mad* if I sleep another 30 minutes?"


"No."


"Ok.  I'll get up when you get up."


Another moment of silence.


"I'm getting up. I'll see you tonight. Love you."


"Love you too."












*the whole snoozing-and/or-not-getting-up-to-the-alarm thing becomes a point of contention when it goes off 30 minutes before the other person's [and inadvertently wakes them up]. Completely understandable. I think (hope) I've gotten much better about this.

Well, hello 2011.

The last few days have been great.  


I ended 2010 with a chilly nine-ish mile run with some of the group.  The end was rough, but (or because?) we held a good pace for the first few miles.  Especially the first mile, gah.  Afterwards, showered, changed, and still shivering, I met Matt at Frank's Diner. After breakfast, I crashed for a midday nap.  Awesome. 


We celebrated at my family's house (Happy Birthday Dad!) and then headed out to the Hamilton's for a quiet and fun NYE - great food, wonderful people.

Photo: Mike Upton

Oh yeah, and some really good drinks, including a St.- Germaine's Cocktail (var: lemon twist) and a (new-to-me) beer from Dogfish Head.


For a very detailed New Yorker article on Sah'Tea, go here.


I scored my bottle of Sah'Tea from the Dirty Santa party.  Since it said chai, I was expecting a darker brew with some strong spice.


Instead, it really reminded me of a Belgian wit or hefeweizen or something of that sort in appearance and smell, only it tasted stronger.  The beer had a nice golden color and an interesting smell - I got a lot of juniper, though it took me a while to place it.  We split the bottle between five or six people.  I don't know that I would want to drink more than the small glass I had, but it was pretty good.  


We didn't stay out too much later than midnight and had a lazy morning.  A lazy morning that included pancakes with real maple syrup from Trader Joe's.  Pancakes were thick, fluffy, and really tasty.

This look says "I have not yet had coffee. But I do have a spatula.
Back off with the camera."

We filled the rest of the day with quiet time and family.  It was a great way to start off 2011.

I'll be back to regularly scheduled blogging this week, hope you all had a safe and happy start to the new year!

Year In Review...

"You don't know where you're going if you don't know where you've been."

I looked for the original source for this quote, and came up with the following: cliche, 'old saying', 'they', and even Will Smith as 'Hitch' (though, unfortunately, I couldn't verify that).

Like crop circles or the origin of that plate of cookies in the conference room... just because I don't know where it comes from, doesn't make it less relevant/interesting/delicious.

Accumulation of food in said conference room.  Winter, 2010.

Cliche or not... this time of year, it makes sense to look back at what I've accomplished before I sit down and decide where I want to go.

One fish.. two fish... seven fish??

Don't be fooled by the Irish name; my mother's side of the family is Italian.  Extremely Italian.  Italian enough that I wish I remembered my grandparents, because I'm sure I would have loved them. 

Periodically I try to get in touch with my Italian roots.  I took an Italian class at HCC, but one evening a week after work is a really difficult way to learn a language.  I sometimes cook Italian - not just pasta and sauce, but regional favorites that usually end up just... amazing.  

And my family has some Italian traditions.

One of those is the Feast of the Seven Fishes, on Christmas Eve.

Ghost of Christmas-- zOMG!!!

I try to get my workouts in during the early morning, before work.  Really early.  Waking at 4:45am early.  


Getting up at that hour does take some adjustment.


It took me about three months to get on a consistent schedule, where I wasn't sleeping through the alarm.  This requires a few things...

• Consistency... when I'm training regularly, I get up by 8 even on the weekends.
• An early bedtime... to prevent Mo-Zombie mode. (like a normal zombie, only instead of brains I want "sleeeeep...")
• Packing ahead... to cut down on the amount of thinking I have to do in the early morning hours.

I cut back the frequency of my workouts after the marathon, and recently returned to my normal schedule. Because I've failed in consistency (currently re-establishing the pattern) and the early bedtime (this also requires an adjustment in habit), for the last week or two the zombie-ness has been a little worse.  

But I found an unexpected cure last Friday.

Call me Writer.

During my internet travels recently, I read something interesting. And because I can no longer recall the source (I really, really wish I could)... I'm going to resort to clumsy paraphrasing.


The person said that a writer should introduce himself or herself as a writer. Not as an aspiring writer.  Not as a bartender.  Not as a sales clerk.  Not as a graduate student or anything else, but as a writer.  


The point was that when I say "I am a writer," I'm actualizing that goal. I'm making it a reality.


At least, I am if I say "I am a writer" and I actually write.  That is sort of key.


But when that's offered as a career, there are questions that come along with it.

A White Elephant Christmas

I do like the holidays, even if it sometimes means stress.  I like the lights and the decorations, I like getting together with my family and the smell of food.  Now that I'm older, I love that the friends that have dispersed across the country drift back through town.


And I like parties.


One popular activity is a white elephant gift exchange, which combines the joy of gift-giving with ruthless, cutthroat strategy and stealing.


Of course, I'm only joking.  Sort of.


This year, the HoCoBoCo (Books and Cooks) club did a comfort food potluck (which was amazing, but not part of this post) and an exchange.  My contribution was a picnic cheese board which slid open to reveal cheese-carving-implements.  And I attached the gift receipt, so at worst, the recipient got a trip to the exchange line at BB&B.

I picked number 13.  Each person who went before me selected a new gift, took great care in opening it, and was excited about their gift.  And they were all very gracious.  Paraphrasing slightly, it went something like this...

A Slight Imbalance.

I had a slight breakdown this evening.


It happens every so often.  I'm chugging along, pushing through, feeling a little flustered but otherwise fine.  And then the stress hits.


Usually it's set off by something I've been neglecting.  When I get swamped, I let little things go.  I'll do the laundry, but I won't put it away.  I'll stack non-essential mail off in one corner, ignore emails that I probably should answer.


And then the piles get too high to ignore.


Last year, right around this time, I lived on coffee and about three hours of sleep per night.  I lost something like fifteen pounds.  It was not the ideal diet plan, and I was glad when it was over.


I nearly hit the edge, when at 8:15 I was still in the lab.  I felt like the only one in the building.  And I had very little to show for my eleven hour day, nary a dent in the staggering amount of work I need to get done in the next six months.  


At the last minute, I took a step back.  I took a moment to breathe.  And I thought about how to put all of these 'MUST DO NOOOOOW' things into perspective.

Things I learned this week: November 14

And now a sampling of things I learned this past week...

1.  Grimace (Pug) has very vivid dreams.  Sometimes I can hear him yelping and paddling from the next room.

2.  Wearing a bright green-yellow shirt while running makes it impossible to drop a sock.

3.  Bigotry can live in any zip code.

4.  So can tolerance.

5.  I get impatient at seminars when I realize no new information is forthcoming.

6.  Bon Fresco is awesome with a capital Awesome.

7.  Neglecting exercise in favor of sleeping or writing is not always a good idea.

8.  Starbucks gingerbread latte is nasty.  I used to have fond memories... no idea what happened.

9.  I <3 my Marine.  (Alright that's cheating.  I already knew that.)

10. If I find myself saying 'I have nothing to do'... I'm doing it wrong.

What did you learn (or remember) last week?

Personal revelation: hulk smash!

I am actually a pretty easy-going person.  I keep my hangups under wraps in the privacy of my own home, prefer rational discussion to livid debate, and understand that many people will not, in fact, agree with my values or point of view.


But occasionally... usually after reading a comments section on a website... I transform.  Like Bruce Banner to Hulk, with less Green and slightly more estrogen, I grip the keyboard, wave it around, and let out an unearthly, primal scream.


Alright, in reality, it's more like this.

XKCD #386