Horror movies - most of them - don't really frighten me.
They're gross, don't get me wrong. Most are filled with gratuitous violence, bizarre and disappointing monsters, (largely) annoying characters, and trying-too-hard-for-jump-in-the-seat moments. Or at least, that's what they feel like when I watch the average horror flick.
No, what scares the bejeezus out of me is the subtle creepy things. The things that seem like they could, actually, almost be real.
This is why I liked "Under The Dome", Stephen King's latest novel, despite the last few chapters - I won't explain further, because I don't want to spoil anything.
It's the suspense. The shadow of things that seem like they could be real (even when I know, on some level, that they're not). It's a delicious kind of fear, like crossing my arms and letting myself fall backwards into a shadow - part reality, and part surreal.
So, knowing (and maybe, if you're like me, understanding) this, imagine: it's dark outside - the sun has gone down, it's maybe 9pm. The house is quiet. You're reading a book. You look up from the page, frown, and listen. You hear music.
The piped, clown-tastic music that comes from an ice cream truck.
You look out the window. Darkness. Quiet. And then the music again, a phantom ice cream truck cruising the neighborhood - never seen, but on the prowl - in the middle of the night (or close enough).
A little creepy?
Which is why when I finally saw the truck, after weeks of NOT seeing the truck, I had to pull over and take a picture. Before I started snapping away, I wondered what he thought of this weird woman taking flash photos of his truck.
And then I realized he's been trying to sell ice cream at 9pm. In April. This is actually really creepy from an I-would-never-let-a-child-near-this-van perspective, even if you don't believe in "scary" things. So I decided I didn't care.
Thus, I give you: The Elkridge Creeper Ice Cream Man (or, to be fair since I couldn't see inside, Woman)
|Proof I'm not just hearing Ice Cream Truck music in my head.|
This was actually still creepy after I saw the truck. I hurried home.
At least it wasn't Pennywise.